Helicopter or Snowplow?

I was recently supplying for a day and found myself enjoying a short respite in the department office, snacking from my trusty 40+ year old Rubbermaid lunchbox, when the conversational road turned suddenly with the arrival of a particularly vexing email received by one of the others in the room. Essentially, the message was from a "concerned" parent about how they viewed the present failures of the educational system, and in particular the teacher, involved services and administration, when it came to the care of their child. The message regaled the misgivings of those involved, the transgressions the child had revealed when queried, topped with accusations of negligence on the part of all involved.

You could hear the proverbial pin drop as the contents of the message were shared, having been edited to protect the child's identity.

Anyone who's taught for any length of time will have been faced with this type of situation, and while there are always nuggets of truth in the message, a lot of what is written is emotionally charged and bias as all get out because their kid couldn't possibly behave in that manner. The nuts and bolts of this particular instance surrounded a Gr 9 student with an IEP who mistakenly let the cat out of the bag that they haven't been staying for Study Hall each day, prompting the mother to lose her mind over fears of her child's safety. Who was protecting her child from the world's dangers during that 80 minute period? How could the school be so callous and careless? It had to be the staff's fault that the student wasn't where they were directed to be! Why hadn't their child been escorted to the supervised site ... her child couldn't possibly be trusted to follow directions without accompaniment, could they? I'll admit that there are complicating factors here, considering the age (Gr 9) and IEP (diagnosed learning difficulties), but the insinuation that the staff was negligent? I've seen the staff at work, first hand, and a more caring bunch you'd be hard-pressed to find.

It's important at this point to note that things operate significantly different in today's pandemic-challenged schools, and many outside the school will not be aware of the changes. Under the present structure of quadmesters, your child's teacher is responsible for their students from 8:00-10:00 and 10:40-12:40. leaving supervisory teachers (part of the Collective Agreement) to cover from 10:00-10:40 (lunch) and 12:40-2:00 (Study Hall). These supervising teachers are tasked with covering a section of the school in a state of constant motion, since there aren't enough to cover the individual classrooms. The students have been clearly instructed to remain in their classrooms ... even gyms ... to maintain their cohorts, as dictated by pandemic procedures. Some students, especially those with IEPs, may be directed to the school's Resource Room, where the Special Education staff are available to give more personalized assistance with incomplete assignments. 90-95% of student's families have granted their child permission to forgo Study Hall, heeding the agreement that they leave the school building and not roam the hallways or visit other cohorts. 

I thought to myself that this was a classic case of Helicopter Parenting. In the event that you're not familiar with this term in an educational setting, it is defined as, "A parent who takes an overprotective or excessive interest in the life of their child or children. " (CLICK) If you ask any educator right now, they'll likely be able to point to anywhere from of 10-20% of the class roster where this is relevant. 

Helicopter parenting is typically exemplified by the following 7 scenarios:

#1 You Fight Your Child's Battles

Your daughter comes home in tears after an argument with a friend. What do you do? If you answered, “Call the friend’s mom to work out the problem,” you need to take a step back.
Try this instead: Be a support system, but let them talk it out. Teach them how to calm their emotions, then help them explore ways they and their friend can work it out on their own.

#2 You Do Their Schoolwork
Put on your preschooler’s shoes. Solve a hard math equation for your teen … there are plenty of ways to swoop in to save your kids from feeling frustrated. But healthy levels of stress can actually boost their problem-solving skills.
Try this instead: Let your kids figure things out on their own. Praise their efforts when they stick with hard situations.

#3 You Coach Their Coaches
If you shout advice from the stands during your kids’ games or corner the coach to talk after every practice, it might be time to sideline yourself. Sports can teach your child how to deal with conflict, work toward a goal, be a leader, and cope with defeat. But it has to be their team, not yours.
Try this instead: If they ask for your help or you can see they have a problem, teach them how to talk to the coach themselves.

#4 You Keep Your Kids on a Short Leash

You stick around for drop-off birthday parties. You drive your teen to friends’ houses even when they’re only a short walk away. You send daily check-in texts (plural) to your college student. Sound familiar? If so, it’s time to cut the apron strings and let your kids build some self-confidence.
Try this instead: Create chances for them to be independent: Let them play in the yard while you stay inside or walk the dog solo.

#5 You're a Maid in Your Own House
Do you still make your first grader’s bed, clean your teen’s room, or do your college student’s laundry? It’s time to lighten your load. Make your kid pitch in around the house and you’ll teach them responsibility for a lifetime.
Try this instead: Start with small tasks and build from there. Be clear about what you expect them to do, and praise a job well done.

#6 You Play It Too Safe
“Get down from up there!” “Don’t ride so fast!” “Hold my hand down the slide!” Would you bubble wrap your kids if you could? Turns out you can protect them too much. When you don’t let them take physical or mental risks, you can stunt their development.
Try this instead: Remember the goal is to keep them as safe as necessary, not as safe as possible. Let them climb a tree, or fall and scrape their knee. It’s good for their growth as a person.

#7 You Can't Let Them Fail
Think of the last time you made a mistake. Chances are, you learned from it. Your kids need to do the same. Trial and error teaches them how to make their way in the world. If you take over a project or task to “do it right,” they won’t learn how to tackle problems in the future.
Try this instead: Let them make mistakes every once in a while. When they fail, encourage them to try again.

In that same vein, helicopter parents sometimes metamorphosize into Snowplow Parents ... sometimes referred to as Bulldozer or Lawnmower parents ... as the newest cohort of Uber-intensive parenting that can include booking their adult children's haircuts, texting their college kids to wake them up so they don't sleep through a test, and even calling their kids' employers. They are the ones who try to mow down obstacles in their children's way to make their lives easier, protect their kids from experiencing hardship or stress, and help them succeed. (CLICK)

As a parting thought, I'll readily admit that the world, in general, is a more dangerous place than it was when I was in high school, prompting some parent's almost militaristic protection schemes lest their child be exposed to some nefarious person or situation. Understanding the WHY doesn't excuse the HOW, however, and IMHO, are doing more harm than good, creating a large contingent of adolescents that not only struggle to make decisions by analyzing the consequences themselves, but also expose them to enhanced levels of potential strife as their natural rebellious inclinations result in bypassing DEFCOM 5 through 3. 

Extremes don't solve problems; if we can find some ground in the middle, our children will be better for it. We can all agree that a higher level of caution is warranted in today's world, but full-on SWAT surveillance is not the best choice either. 

Just some thoughts from the recliner.

Great people still exist!

I'm a glass is half guy, in general, and I try to look for the good things rather than the bad, but I do admit that even I fall prey to brief periods of dismay. Fortunately, when those times present themselves, I more often than not am figuratively slapped out of it by someone restoring my faith in my fellow humans. One such incident recently happened thanks to a former neighbour and involved those delicious looking nuggets of gloriousness you see to the left.

To fully appreciate the story, you need a little background info ...

If there are people who feel that this world has become increasingly less caring and cordial, you could excuse their angst, what with the Doom 'n Gloom circulating around the Internet and on the nightly news. I am here to tell you, at least from my perspective, there are still plenty of great people in this world, and with that statement, hopes that the goodwill of all are still high.

Why do I harbour such positivism, you might ask?

Joyce and I have lived in the same house for 30 years. During that time, we have been gifted a number of really awesome neighbours, on both sides, resulting in some good friendships being established. In one of the cases, a woman and her adult children moved in and we quickly established a cordial relationship across the fences of a backyard. Over the years, the dynamics of the family altered slightly, but the friendships became more substantial, especially when the daughter moved back in with her gorgeous cherubs, delighting SuperMom Joyce. By the time that the house changed hands, we had shared a bunch of laughs and giggles. 

One of the adult children, Taylor, has made an effort to maintain other friendships from the neighbourhood, so since their departure, we regularly run into each other and have a small catch up. Recently, our afternoon reading efforts were interrupted by a knock at the front door, somewhat of a rare occurrence these days. Taylor had dropped by to ask if we would be willing to lend him some cake decorating tools (see the photo at the top left) since it was his mother's birthday and he wanted to surprise her with some cupcakes. The answer was of course yes, and we thought not much more of it. We were more than happy to help.

A couple of days later, another knock at the door revealed Taylor returning the tools in addition to 4 cupcakes, made with his loving little hands, as a thanks for helping him out. Fresh out of the oven, one of them barely had time to cool down before it delighted my tastebuds with a nutty, buttery deliciousness that impressed me significantly. 

Many would chalk this pleasant exchange up to the adage, "One good turn deserves another." and you wouldn't be wrong, especially considering the aforementioned friendship, but it still propped up my belief in the goodness of others. While we were more than happy to help Taylor out with the loaner of the icing tip tools, for him to think fondly enough of our gesture to repay us with the fruits of his labour was touching. 

I can't change the thoughts of others, but it's times like that this that reinforce my constant efforts to look for the silver lining. As the former Notre Dame football head coach Lou Holtz once said, "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it." IMHO, we are the sole determiners of our attitude, and subsequently responsible for our daily frame of mind. If I steel myself in the desire to look for positives, I will more often than not come away seeing the good in life rather than feeling buried under it.

Great people like Taylor help keep me that way!

Incompetence knows no bounds!

With Ford Nation's release of the provincial vaccine program's booking portal on March 15th, the government Tsunami of incompetence has gained momentum, spreading pangs of stress and frustration further than expected ... or, maybe it was expected ... hmmmm? 

Like so many Canadians, and especially Ontarians (if that's even a word), the nightly news reports of Covid-19 infection spread and vaccination progress have become increasingly mundane, resulting in a dangerous ambivalence for many. In my home, we try to watch the local CTV Barrie based show with hopes of a more localized expose of the progression of this pandemic. While CTV Barrie does their best, for me it becomes a nightly standardized format, numbing me into a shoulder-shrugging "What are you going to do?" response. As the Canadian government approved the string of available vaccines, I was hopeful that the powers in charge would be able to prove my fears unfounded, and get needles on the arms of many, especially the most vulnerable.

I may be "preaching at the choir" here, but I can't be the only one that had reservations about Ford's competency to handle such a humungous task, fuelled by the string of bone-headed decisions over the past few months. When the "800 pound gorilla" announced that the province would hand off the organization of the actual vaccine clinics to the local health units, my wife and I met eyebrow-raised looks of exasperation. We have grown to have as much trust in Ford et al as you might have in a used car salesman like Boss Hog of Dukes of Hazard fame. Granted, we have little actual knowledge of how to execute the task, nor a quality understanding of how OHIP works, but the idea of vaccines themselves being federally procured, provincially controlled, and municipally administered seems like a disaster waiting to happen. Adding to our sense of frustration, Ford announced that booking appointments for vaccinations would be under his control with a provincial web site. "What could possibly go wrong there?" said I, with all due dripping sarcasm.

True to form, the rollout of the web site was a clusterf_ _k, just like we expected.

Our mothers are both in the high risk demographic, with my mother north 80 and Joyce's mother north of 90. When my mother attempted to access the booking site on the morning of the 15th, she encountered a hopelessly long process, as one would unfortunately anticipate. After multiple frustration-filled failed attempts, she opted for the telephone service, and as you likely surmised, was gifted an exhaustingly long wait on hold. She reached out to me with her frustrations because the error message she was receiving from the site was "the page has been tampered with" and she wished my input on whether that was a problem with software on her end. We decided that I would give it a shot as well, since I had the time and the proverbial "two heads are better than one" mentality, but I got the same bizarre response. Low and behold, after a couple of attempts, I was able to access the bookings, and my initial glee quickly faded into confusion when my screen revealed that the closest clinic was in Orillia. Why in the world would senior citizens be asked to travel over 30 minutes away? That makes no sense! Calling my mom to explain, we agreed that waiting to see if things improved was the correct choice, even if it meant that there would be the inevitable delay in actually getting stuck in the arm.

Later that evening, mom called to say that she had discovered a news story on-line that the government upheld everyone's opinion of their incompetence when it was revealed that their web site was missing clinic information for many municipalities. Seriously? Was there no limit to their incompetence?

If you think that's the end, you're not even in the same area code.

I got another call from my mom later that night. She had been able to get through all of the hoops and booked an appointment for Friday the 19th. Yowsa! Great news! And a big sigh of relief passed my lips.

Wait! The game's not over!

The booking process takes information like email and telephone contacts, and not receiving any indication of confirmation for over 24 hours prompted my mom's increasing sense of dread that something was amiss. Finally reaching a human voice, her suspicion was confirmed that all of her work was for naught and the appointment was hanging in the cyber-winds. There is a happy ending to all of this, though, and she was able to re-book for a few days later in March with confirmation of not only shot ONE but also shot TWO! While we were both feeling a sense of relief, we agreed that until the actual puncture of the needle, we wouldn't hold our breath. Stay tuned for details on that! I will note that she was not overly impressed with the 16 week delay between the shots, but we agreed that it was something beyond our control.

The whole sundae of angst was topped by a bright red cherry of bewilderment! 

After the affair with mom, I chose to check whether I could book something for my 90+ MIL. As you likely guessed, it was a NO-GO, revealing that the closest clinic to her was over 80 km away. Great news, he says with a sarcastic nod! A phone call to her mom revealed to Joyce that not only was her mother's local health unit info missing, but it was so on purpose, a decision made that since there was single digit spread in her community, the seniors there would be put on the back burner. Look, I can appreciate that the efforts to get people vaccinated are tempered by thoughts of working through the most vulnerable, but since she lives in cottage country where the people of "hot spots" have already chosen to travel, it would appear prudent to me that ALL Ontarians (there's that word again) who are above 80 should get their shot, regardless of postal code. Perhaps the "squeaky wheel" theory will come into play if enough folks in Cottage Country complain?

The media is overflowing with ads about the potential dangerous effects to our mental health the pandemic could harbour. How is any of this helping, in that regard? From my personal perspective ... this is called Coach Ps Perspective, after all ... the regularly revealed incompetence is exacerbating the effects of the pandemic at a faster rate than the actual conditions. 

Like Forest Gump, "That's all I have to say about that."

I'm straddling the fence

If you're a Social Media follower, you'll likely have seen the emotional reactions to a variety of situations surrounding the #cancelculture decisions of late. I will stand up and be counted that I am completely straddling the fence on this, aghast that the entertainment of my youth is being ripped apart using today's politically correct standards, while also acknowledging that the proponents of some change have a good point. 

What is the right way to feel? I guess it's case by case.

According to dictionary.com (CLICK), "Cancel culture refers to the popular practice of withdrawing support for (canceling) public figures and companies after they have done or said something considered objectionable or offensive. Cancel culture is generally discussed as being performed on social media in the form of group shaming."

In case you missed them, some of my generation's childhood heroes have borne the brunt of emotional attacks from those who feel strongly that the messages conveyed are culturally offside. From Dr Seuss' depictions of racial stereotypes, to rape-culture messages construed by Pepe Le Pew, to the degendering of Mr + Mrs Potato Head, to the inclusivity of new Barbie bodies and physical features, to condemnation of Miss Piggy's spousal abuse laden Karate chops of her beloved Kermit the frog, the pop culture icons of our adolescence are squarely under the microscope.

I'm not sure what started it all, but some Internet research reveals that while some are the result of a cyber-swell of finger pointing, others are self-imposed, likely a result of a "we'll do it to us before they do it to us" ideal. The six books that Dr. Seuss Enterprises discontinued are “And to Think That I Saw It on Mulberry Street,” “If I Ran the Zoo,” “McElligot’s Pool,” “On Beyond Zebra!,” “Scrambled Eggs Super!,” and “The Cat’s Quizzer.” None of them are currently available for sale from many retailers online or the official Dr. Seuss website. None of them made the USA TODAY Best-Selling Books list. CLICK

I'll be perfectly honest, my own children were raised on a steady diet of Dr Seuss, with my son in particular loving the zany, wacky world the books created. Now that the issue is flapping in the breeze, I can recall a twinge of discomfort when we read "If I ran the zoo" but I don't recall reading the others. When the announcement was mainstream, the cadre of keyboard warriors condemning "The Cat in the hat" and "Horton hears a Who" for perceived transgressions ... that I DON'T agree with TBH ... that are damaging young minds of today, created passionate support on both sides of the argument.

Lost in all of this is the notion that if you don't like what a book teaches your children, then choose to not purchase it or read it with your child. If Dr Seuss Enterprises wishes to voluntarily withdraw titles because they feel they now see parts of the book are counter to the company's ideals, then who am I to argue. What was tolerated in past times is no excuse for continuing to allow outright prejudice or racism to continue. I draw the line at literature censorship though, and do not in any way, shape, or form support a vocal minority making choices for the masses.

In my venture into the wormhole of the Internet, I found out that Hasbro Toys, one of the world's largest toy producers, announced the removal of binary gender labels on their iconic Mr Potato Head and his family. "Hasbro is making sure all feel welcome in the Potato Head world by officially dropping the Mr. from the Mr. Potato Head brand name and logo to promote gender equality and inclusion," the company said. The rebranding for the modern (??) family will invite kids to create their own Potato Head family with two large (gender non-specific) potato bodies, a small potato body, and 42 accessories. Not to mess the a good thing, Hasbro will continue to produce the Mr and Mrs versions, in the event that your family is less sensitive to this particular issue. CLICK This one is a complete "Meh" for me. I support the need for toys to represent a wide variety of familial situations and applaud Hasbro for allowing the consumer to vote with their wallets be continuing the "old" line.

Barbie Dolls have generated controversy since her introduction in 1959. The creator, Ruth Handler, based Barbie’s body on a German doll called Lilli, a prostitute gag gift handed out at bachelor parties ... How's that for a mind-blower!  Her proportions were designed accordingly. The misogynistic boardroom of 1959 laughed Handler out of the room insisting that nobody would want to play with a doll with breasts. Would you like a steaming heap o' crow fellas? Mattel Toys hopes that new dolls with diverse body types, new skin tones and hair textures introduced recently, will more closely reflect the changes in Barbie demands around the world. Adding three new body types is sure to irritate some, and picking out the terms petite, tall and curvy, while translating them into dozens of languages without causing offense took months. Some young owner will strip curvy Barbie and try to put original Barbie’s clothes on her and find not everything will Velcro shut, possibly prompting child-powered fits. Exasperated parents calling Mattel to lodge a complaint will find they have set up a separate help line just to deal with Project Dawn complaints. CLICK

Did I miss something? My own daughter had a host of Barbies plus numerous outfits, so I feel qualified to offer an opinion, but she was absorbed in the Barbie world well before she recognized that post-puberty females come in a variety of shapes. While applaud Mattel for "modernizing" Barbie, it would seem to me that the effort was Herculean, leading to a host of new costs that will be happily passed onto the consumer ... like a grandpa version of this guy ... God willing.

Now Social Media's keyboard warriors are bleating that if the love-struck Le Pew is cancelled for inappropriate behaviour, then Miss Piggy should be too. To be fair Miss Piggy’s behaviour has been known to be rather problematic, but it’s all part of her shtick. Her persistent sexual harassment of Kermit the Frog, karate chopping of various characters, and quick-trigger temper means that this diva is certainly no picture of innocence. Disney+, who bought the rights to The Muppets, now has a disclaimer, “This program includes negative depictions and/or mistreatment of people or cultures. These stereotypes were wrong then and are wrong now. Rather than remove this content, we want to acknowledge its harmful impact, learn from it and spark conversation to create a more inclusive future together.” CLICK

IMHO, the purpose of the Muppets, and entertainment like it, is to make light of ridiculous situations by forcing a hyperbole of society in order to promote giggling or outright guffaws. If Miss Piggy's narcissistic demands for attention are deemed censor worthy, how long will it be before the Swedish Chef's stereotypical mumblings fall prey to the chopping block? What about Oscar the Grouch's potential for damaging young psyches with his lack of empathy and self-control? How many still view Cookie Monster's gluttony as grin-growing antics and can't get their head wrapped around his conversion to Veggie Monster? 

How much is too much? Of that, I'm not sure, but I do feel strongly that all of these characters were born out of the intention to make people laugh ... young people, in particular. While I support some of the changes that were simply a reflection of society's biases and transgressions of the past, casting the blanket of criticism across all "modern" sources of humour is unnerving in the least, and downright dangerous in it's boiled down form.

Yep, firmly straddling the fence.

#IWD2021 #ChooseToChallenge

On Monday, March 8th, the world will mark International Women's Day in 2021. According to the site internationalwomensday.com, the theme for 2021 surrounds the hashtag #ChooseToChallenge which is explained as, "A challenged world is an alert world. Individually, we're all responsible for our own thoughts and actions - all day, every day. We can all choose to challenge and call out gender bias and inequality. We can all choose to seek out and celebrate women's achievements. Collectively, we can all help create an inclusive world. From challenge comes change, so let's all choose to challenge."

Riddle me this, Batman ... CLICK ... After you've watched, ask yourself if you thought the same way or did you immediately see the solution?

Why should we pay attention to International Women's Day?

Ask Wyomia Tyus.

You don't know who that is?

That's part of the problem ... And why IWD is so important.

At the 1968 Summer Olympics in Mexico City, Winomia Tyus became the first person in history — man or woman — to win two consecutive gold medals in the 100-meter dash. It would a full 20 years before anyone matched that feat when Carl Lewis defended his 100m gold in 1988, and nearly 50 years for anyone to break that record when Usain Bolt won his third straight 100m gold in 2016. Over 52 years later, she has largely been forgotten. Although she also protested racial injustice in her own way by shunning the USA track's uniform of white shorts for her own black ones, she was overshadowed by John Carlos' and Tommie Smith's raised fists on the podium. Even more curious, when Lewis won his second straight gold in the 100m in 1988, the media celebrated him as the first athlete to do that, 20 years after Tyus had actually done it.

In 1968, there was no media machine to trumpet her landmark accomplishment on TV and the Internet. There was no live post-race interview with an American flag draped around her shoulders. There was no Twitter to pass around quotes and videos. There were no sponsorships from Corporate America to boost her post-Olympic coffers. After her record-breaking Olympic triumph, Tyus did what was expected at the time ... she got married, had a child and became a teacher and housewife.

*Thanks to Yahoo Sports for the info!

A simple Internet search will point the way to a number of posts, sites and resources that will provide a host of information about IWD and it's historical significance as a global day celebrating the social, economic, cultural and political achievements of women. It provides a focus for accelerating gender parity by celebrating women's achievements, raising awareness about women's equality, and lobbying for fundraising efforts with female-focused charities. Since it's birth in 1908, marked by a 15000 strong march of women through New York City with the aim to point the injustices surrounding working hours, wages and the right to vote, IWD underwent a host of changes from 1909 through 1917, before it was globally agreed that March 8th would from then on be reserved for it's observance. 

Interestingly, IWD is a national holiday in a wide variety to countries around the globe, but has somehow been missed by the government of Canada, although traditions of the day involves men honouring their mothers, wives, girlfriends, colleagues, etc with acknowledgement and small gifts. In some countries, IWD has the equivalent status of Mother's Day where children shower their mothers and grandmothers with gifts of appreciation.

IMHO, we don't need a National Holiday, although that would be an awesome thing to have happen! What we need is a collective effort to to eradicate so much archaic thinking, solidified over 1000's of years of gender bias thanks to perceived genetic advantages attributed to having a Y chromosome, and the resulting testosterone boost. When I pause to reflect on the women in my immediate bubble, their sheer awesomeness is overwhelming, spurring a swelling sense of gratitude that they choose to include me in their lives, but I honestly don't see my relationship with any of them as a competition where one of us holds more value than the other.

I've written on a number of occasions about my best friend and wife, Joyce, the amazing woman who said YES and her SuperMom powers, but I have rarely publicly stated how deeply impacted I am by all that she is. From where I stand, there is not a more caring, loving, compassionate, selfless person ... male or female ... that I know of. All humans, regardless of gender, have strengths and weaknesses, the effects of both Nature and Nurture, but it has never once entered my mind that I am more worthy, more deserving or more valuable than her, simply because I am male. Those who don't understand what IWD is all about might view the fact that I worked outside of the home through some misogynistic lens (while Joyce worked inside it) granting me elevated value to the family. Quite the contrary! When we chose to have children ... obviously something she was going to be highly involved in ... and we both felt strongly that raising children was the most important facet of family, requiring someone's full-time efforts, so we had to decide if the primary care giver was her or I. After much discussion, we agreed that since I had chosen a career with longevity, security, and lucrativeness, she would choose the career of SuperMom. Little did I know, way back then, that she had not made a concession with this decision. This was 100% what she wished for! My point here is that there was never any notion that one of us was undervalued for our part in this family, regardless if it fit some antiquated definition of gender roles. 

A very strong influence on who I have become is my mother. My parents had the same discussion as Joyce and I, early in their lives, and with my father's chosen career in medicine, it made perfect sense for mom to take on the primary care of "The Four Warts". Without selling medicine short, I would venture that the task of raising 4 very differently interested and talented young males was Herculean in comparison, and I am not at all sure that it would have worked out similarly if the roles were reversed. With my father regularly working 80-100 hour weeks in those early years, mom was tackling the task more or less solo. As an impressionable young lad, I was awed at the way my mother held it all together with the 4 hellions going this way and that, then astounded when she willingly embraced the added responsibility of running my father's medical office. She was the rock foundation that our family was built on and I will tell you that I don't think there are many more better than my mom ... maybe on par, but not better.

Another incredible female in my life is my daughter, Maddison. Much like her mother, she is an incredibly loving, compassionate, caring, and supportive person who brightens the room each time she enters with her massive smile and warm personality. She has a keenly intelligent mind, and inherited/learned my obsessive work ethic, always striving to bring her best to each and every challenge. This combination that will serve her well as she navigates this life. 

My dream is that she will be free from bias and inequality within her lifetime. To all of the women of the world, I promise that I will not relegate my efforts for your equality to only March 8th, and I will endeavour to free my thinking of unconscious, yet limiting, bias. All women deserve at least that.

You always have a choice!

I have watched a gaggle of documentaries on various streaming services during this pandemic. Most of them have been worth the time invested and many have raised my eyebrows in curiosity. A significant number have prompted continued thought, and all have achieved their goal of provided an entertaining escape from the structure of pandemic life. I'd like to point you in the direction of three (they are all multi-episode) in particular, that have provided subject matter for Joyce and I as we walk our way to better health.

"Chile: The Longest Descent" on GCN+

Many of you who have read my Blog posts are already well aware that I've fallen hard for the #bikelife. One of the many pleasures that come with that choice is the phenomenon of the Global Cycling Network (search GCN ... free on YouTube) and its zany, but knowledgeable, hosts/experts. Easily the furthest along the zany scale is James "Hank" Lowsey-Williams and his effervescent, life-is-awesome, quick-to-the-challenge personality. The gist of the two-part documentary is about stepping up to the plate when challenged to ride, as the title suggests, the longest cycling descent, a journey of over 300 km starting at the top of Chile's Ojos del Sando peak (6890m) and riding to Chile's Pacific Coast. What at first fits the bill of simply zany, becomes outright ludicrous as the movie unfolds the twists and turns of mountain climbing. If this sounds like something intriguing, the only downfall is that the streaming service GCN+ has a cost. If you a bike-head, the cost is completely justifiable. If not, you might have to do some research and thinking.

I don't wish to spoil the surprise of The Longest Descent, but I can tell you that the task amounts to something a select few on this planet would/should consider, let alone add to their Bucket List. If you take a flier and give this documentary a watch, you'll quickly understand (a) the significance of the task, (b) the commitment required to achieve it, and (c) the questionable sanity of the participants, at least IMHO. The choice made to not only check this off, but to film a documentary about the action, is a 100% head scratcher.

"Talasbuan - An Off-Grid Life" on YouTube

I'm really not sure how the wife and I stumbled across this particular YouTube channel. We made the decision a few years ago to drop our long-standing relationship with Rogers cable services, relegating our watching efforts to what we can stream. We subscribe to a couple of pay services, but YouTube isn't one of them, so we endure YouTube's regular interruptions with commercials, but it's those commercials whose very existence allow "Vlogers" to make some much needed income, leading to the conception of this particular channel. With it's production, the channel's series of videos gift us an intimate look at life off-grid in northern Sweden, Jamtland to be specific, leaving this retiree perplexed. The channel is an expose of the life that Tova and Mathias have chosen for themselves featuring seriously old-school farming techniques, shunning running water or plumbing or grid-delivered electricity, managing their desire for the past with the ramifications of their presence on-line. Unlike GCN+, anyone can choose Talasbuan, and if so moved, can provide support in the way of a donation through the couple's patreon.

Here in Canada, there is a rising swell of people who are going stir-crazy thanks to the variety of stay-home orders and lockdowns in the wake of Covid-19. Many of those people have access to government assistance that helps them to fill what they complain is missing with a variety of technologically inspired options. Add to this, the very Canadian habit of expounding on the weather ... in particular, winter weather ... that forces them out their front doors to cozy up to their snowblowers, snow-throwers or shovels, and your retinas will behold a wide variety of choice words and phrases. The fearless couple of Jamtland would look at our conditions here in southern Ontario with a sheepish grin since they pale in comparison to the conditions they choose to find themselves in. Yes, their's is a choice that carries a huge impact on day to day life, but it certainly provides pause and perspective, not to mention massive intrigue about how they manage the day to day, month to month and year to year issues of living in the far north.

"Big's Backyard Ultra: It's Easy Until It's NOT!" on YouTube

Another "freebie" on YouTube, the Backyard Ultra series of videos documents a variety of ultramarathon type competitions ... it's not fair to call them races ... that are the result of the maniacal lunacy of race director Gary “Laz” Cantrell, of Barkley marathon fame (see SIDENOTE below). An apparently simple race concept, Big’s Backyard Ultra has been described as one of the most mentally and strategically complex competitions in the world that features contestants running a 4.1 mile loop every hour, day or night, nonstop. The last person who can, or chooses to, continue to complete the loop in the 60 minutes allowed is crowned the victor. If you watch a few of the films available, you'll shake your head at the staggering mileage these incredible athletes put on their bodies in the pursuit of the crown. You don't have to be runner or the like to enjoy and appreciate the accomplishments enshrined in the footage.

*SIDENOTE: If you haven't watched the Barkley Marathons documentary, put that on you list! "Laz" has some serious issues with enjoying other's pain.

Each of the videos about the Backyard Ultras run in a variety of countries around the globe focuses on a few of the athletes and why they would choose to endure the craziness of such a competition. While confounded by their choices, I am in incredible awe of the drive, focus, and sacrifice of these people, mostly since I know that I could not follow in their unbelievable footsteps. If you're at all curious, you won't be disappointed investing the minutes viewing will cost.

It's always about choices ... and some just leave with a sheer sense of bewilderment!

#unmaskthetruth

I have a friend named Don who is a Pharmacist in BC. He and I met through rugby, when his son played for me on Team Ontario. We have what I would deem is a casual friendship because we haven't been afforded the opportunity to spend quality time enhancing it ... read that as multiple beers on a deck or dock ... but it has featured the two of us penning thoughts to share with our friends. I feel that his posts are far better researched, well worded, and contemplative than mine. I look forward to reading them each day because his thoughts, and the articles he uses to support his assertions, reveal his thoughtful, honest and unbiased opinions. Refreshingly, he tells you when he is being biased.

He recently pointed the way toward an article written about QAnon followers and what author Amanda Marcotte promotes as, "Falsely attributing QAnon and other conspiracy theories to poor education has the potential to reinforce ugly, and often unfair, stereotypes of Democrats as a "liberal elite" that looks down its nose at ordinary Americans and even the working class." Interesting! Especially considering my biases based on limited understanding of this group.

Since watching the insanity that was the capital insurrection infused by QAnon vitriol, I have struggled mightily with the volcanic rise in publicly-voiced support of conspiracy theories purported by QAnon and their like. The previously mentioned article steers the discussion toward what it purports is a "lack of common sense" as the source that fuels such widespread support. I really can't say that I disagree with that notion, but Brian F Kelsey (@stateofthecity) Tweets a much better way to say it with, "It's not a war AGAINST reason; reason is simply being bypassed and outflanked. It is an affirmative war FOR stupidism, with the active, positive promotion of stupidity as a coherent governing ideology & a virtuous social lifestyle."

In a similar vein, Canadian news show W5 recently aired an episode (CLICK) titled Consumed by conspiracy: How so many fall down the rabbit hole examining the QAnon phenomenon. The article associated with the 3 episodes states, "... the term conspiracy has taken on new meaning in the age of social media. Despite what certain videos on YouTube and posts on Facebook would have you believe, there are not any mind-controlling nanomachines planted in the COVID-19 vaccine and no, Hollywood celebrities aren’t eating babies. These are all theories the conspiracy group QAnon pushes. Theories that legions of online followers accept as fact." 

Sitting in my recliner, in this day and age, at my present mental capacity, I am bewildered that any individual, devoid of mental illness or diminished mental faculty, could listen/read these postulations and determine they are based in sane, sound thinking. Later in the W5 article, it asserts, "There are no stereotypes. Education plays no role and neither does a person’s IQ. What most have in common, though, is the belief the world is made of villains and persecuted victims; they see themselves as the latter. Conspiracy theories fuel their sense of outrage and betrayal and give them a scapegoat for their grievances." As previously stated, there are 3 parts to the broadcast and there are links to the different parts on the web page referenced above.

Such are the times we live right now. Social Media has provided the misinformers with a tailor-made vehicle for disseminating a wide array of half truths, warped realities, and outright lies. I can partially relate to the notion of persecuted victims though, in that Joyce and I often discuss those very sentiments as we meander our way around Simcoe County on our daily outings. Maybe using the term victims isn't quite right ... we don't have a pervasive sense of dread ... but the confusion created by so much craziness happening, usually the whim of supposedly intelligent people who others have pledged allegiance to, is enough to make us question many of the mainstream media reports.

I'll be the first one to admit that I have fallen prey to the polished, sophisticated offerings of some misinformists, especially those that use the uncertainty of these times in attempt to steer the confused masses down a particular pathway while promoting a hidden agenda. Thankfully, as these times occur and I vet the truth, I become increasingly wary when confronted with troubling or perplexing articles/videos. 

In the end, being stung once truly does make me twice shy!
As the hashtag implores, #unmaskthetruth