It's up to you to choose!

Have a look at the graphic on the left.
Read it over thoroughly.
Maybe you've read this before ... but maybe you haven't.
It's pretty powerful stuff, IMHO.

One thing that I have learned over my 57 years walking this chunk of interstellar rock is that we have sole control of our attitude surrounding the life we live. We are the masters of our seconds, how we choose to spend them, and how productive we view their use to be. If you're like me, you've caught yourself uttering the dreaded, "I don't have time to ..." in response to a request or suggestion, but is that really the truth? Or is it a case of poor prioritization skills? A key concept in managing those seconds is honestly identifying what is important and creating a hierarchy of To Do's.

I'll be the first to admit to any reader that there are many things that are beyond the realm of personal influence, and that occasionally those seconds get sucked into a vortex external to our control. Having said that, if you examine the root of the issue and honestly identify the causative factors leading to the issue or event, you might find that you're like me and what was originally shrugged off as an external locus was impacted by decisions made with those seconds, creating a vulnerable position.

The point of this occurred to me when examining the "state of the union" as the autumn slowly gave way to winter, and being caught in that transitional time between bare versus snow covered roads/trails. I feel the need to adjust how I use my seconds to really cash in on life. While I don't see myself as person content with being idle, quite likely born from a long educational career being pulled in multiple directions creating a daily pace quite different from the retirement pace I find myself experiencing, I also don't see a perpetual need to continue grinding forward. Keeping that in mind, I find that I am far more content to use my new found freedom to use those seconds for things that for so long were on the back burner. I'm still being pulled in a variety of directions, but those directions are all acceptable and desirable choices now.

Getting up on my personal soapbox, I feel strongly that society today bombards our collective eyeballs with unrealistic and unnecessary expectations for how we should look, be, and live, with the goal of influencing our decisions surrounding our daily use of those seconds. It's not an easy task, but one could step back, look at the big picture, honestly evaluate needs vs wants, and prioritize the important things. It has been my experience that one can alleviate a tremendous amount of stress/internal conflict through effective prioritization leading to a significantly enhanced feeling of control over those seconds. 

One of the most over-looked needs for your seconds is sleep ... are you budgeting enough seconds for that? How about some form of exercise? Even a brisk walk on a lunch break provides enormous health benefits ... look it up! How about spending quality time with loved one? I will admit I allowed far too many of my own seconds to be swallowed by the Community Service vortex.

More "Success is being happy with what you get" and less "Success is getting what you want". 

So, you might be thinking, "How do I actually do that?"
I am by no means an expert in this field, but I do know what has worked for me:
1) arrange quiet time with a recording method - tech if you're inclined; old school pencil+paper if desired
2) Brainstorm a list of what's important to you ... I mean, REALLY important, not "fluff stuff"
3) Review that list and prioritize from MOST important to LEAST important
4) Starting with MOST, examine how many seconds each day it will take to achieve success (Hard to do!)
5) Continue with each other item on the list ... you might even decide to discard something
6) Here's the tough part ... Do a good copy of this list and post it somewhere easily visible
7) Ever time you see the list, ask yourself, "Am I making good use of my seconds?"

I wish you good luck and happy decision making in your pursuit of enhanced control of your seconds!

27 years of AWESOME!

Today is November 24th, 2020. 27 years ago from today, at 6:28 am, our lives changed ... for the better ... with the arrival of Maddison Leigh, our first born. She came into the world as howling, ginger-haired bundle of energy and, if we're honest, not a lot has changed in those 27 years. The howling morphed into belly laughs, the ginger hair is fiery red, and she still lights up a room like she did that early morning years ago with her infectious smile or laugh. She has found her shining star in Chris Cove and they are spending these crazy times transitioning their lives from separate entities into the melting pot of married life, cautiously planned for fall 2021, pandemic willing.

Maddi has accomplished a lot thus far, not the least of which was successfully growing up in a household with yours truly, what with my obsessions, opinions, and workaholic mindset. Genetics being what they are, she inherited most of the best things Joyce and I had to offer, not the least of which is a 24 karat soul and a gargantuan loving heart wrapped up inside an empathetically charged personality, topped off with gingery sweetness. To say that we're proud of the woman she's become doesn't remotely come close to describing the feelings we have.

If you've not had the privilege of meeting our Maddi, here's a few things you've missed out on:
- She's loves to laugh, smiles more often than not, and is quick to share her love with those deserving
- Finding a soulmate in Chris, despite being her first and only love, she smiles demurely and boasts, "Didn't I choose well the first time?"
- As the saying goes, she wears her heart on her sleeve, living her days full of zesty energy
- A talented baker, she spoils those in her bubble with sugary delicacies that look as good as they taste
- She is not afraid of a day's hard work, often going above and beyond the scope of expectations
- An animal lover who has selflessly cared for a wide variety of pets, her present fur-babies Remy (a Portuguese Water Dog) and Pekoe (a orange Tabby cat) are second only to Chris as the apple of her eye
- She possesses a laser sharp focus when required, plying that trait in a successful competitive swimming career, a stellar undergraduate performance, and managing a sports rehab clinic's office, much to the delight of the owners

- While she'll claim to NOT be competitive ... we had our fair share of discussions about this surrounding her swimming ... she'll be the first to admit that she holds herself to a high standard, taking pride in things she chooses to participate in

I'm sure that Chris is very aware that he won the lottery when Maddi chose him to be her forever "Boo", but in case it's escaped his notice, I'll publicly state that ... IMHO ... he is one very lucky young man. Maddi loves large, passionately, and long-time which bodes well when entering into a marriage. When Chris was contemplating proposing to Maddi, he chose the "Old School" approach and sought our approval. Considering the opinion we had formed through our time getting to know Chris, offering our blessing was one of the easiest decisions we ever had to make since we were very confident that their love for each other was deep and strong. 

This could potentially be Maddi's last birthday as a "single" woman, considering this pandemic, and we'd like to gift her our prayers for health, wealth, happiness, and love ... not necessarily in that order ... as she navigates this crazy journey called life. Oh, and just so we're clear, the clock is ticking on Joyce and I, so a grand-baby or two would be greatly appreciated.

We love you forever, 
We'll like you for always,
As long as you're living,
Our baby you'll be.

Happy Birthday sweetie!

Going where (this) man has never gone before!

In the event that this is the first of my Blog posts you've read, I am a recently retired educator, and being retired, I had the choice to "throw my hat into the ring" and become a daily occasional educator ... more commonly referred to as a supply teacher. I made the choice to delay my initial return back into the classroom until I had a better understanding of how the school system would operate under pandemic conditions. Now that I have been back in the classroom, off and on, for 7 weeks, as regular readers can guess, I have formed some thoughts about my experiences.

Those who know me will already be aware that I spent most of my career in both Special Education and HPE (Phys Ed), with the last few years plying my skill set in the Arts with Comm Tech and Photography. Although I have a functioning knowledge ... just enough to be dangerous though ... of Art theory, I have never been blessed with the opportunity to discover the world of Visual Arts. 

That is, at least until now.

I recently spent 4 days subbing for a friend in a Gr10 Visual Art course. To make it even more intimidating, it was the first 4 days of a new "quad-mester" meaning that I had some organization items to take care of, not the least of which was enlightening the class about how the D2L ... the on-line component of the class ... was going to work for Visual Art. I will tell you right here and now that, despite my initial trepidation, the experience was most enjoyable, uplifting, and satisfying. The students were Uber talented, displaying incredible talent and vision for 15 and 16 year olds. I was blown out of the water by the pieces I witnessed being created. I think they may have even enjoyed the few days together ... wishful but hopeful thinking.

Supplying in these pandemic conditions is a darn sight stranger than I anticipated, mostly due to the protocols associated with the conditions surrounding masks, sanitizers, distancing, and interactions in class. Combined, they certainly change the day to day operations. However, when you stop to reflect on things, zoom out, and look and the "big picture", it really isn't as different as you first think. Kids are still kids and most are in school because they wish to continue to expand their minds, with all that entails. In the few supply days that I have done, I have found the students to be very aware and accommodating when it comes to the masking and sanitizing, plus they seem genuinely interested in being in school. I really can't comment on students outside of the class I'm supplying for, since the hallways are pretty vacant most of the time, but the few interactions that I've had were positive. I recognize that there are a significant number of North students who are opting for the "Learn at Home" model, making the total number of bodies in the school quite a bit lower, but the ones here are willing participants in keeping the virus at bay.

Being in my late 50's, I made a conscious decision to limit my supply offerings to a single school, to limit my exposure to the fewest number of people. It made perfect sense, at least to me, that I choose North as the only school I'd accept supply jobs for because I already knew the layout, I had friendships already established (both staff and students), and I was already familiar with the admin. I'm not really looking to return to full time work so I have mentally resigned myself to 3 days in a row, or 3 days a week, as the upper limit of assignments, but as friends situations change and they need assistance, I'll have to be flexible. 

One thing that supply teaching has shown me is that the conditions the government has asked everyone else to live by DEFINITELY are not possible in the classroom environment! The students are very aware and accommodating, but the physical set up is just not able to meet the general expectations. I would venture a guess that the increasing numbers of active cases in Ontario schools is not a coincidence. 

Thanks to the students of that Art class ... It was a good time!

Biking is my new social circle V2.0

In a previous posts, I detailed the curious transformation I have experienced in my physique, attitude, and social circle ... the subject of this particular writing.

As the autumn wanes, and a good ol' Canadian winter looms, I have found myself scouring the various weather forecasting web sites to see if I can reach an understanding of an accurate prediction for the upcoming days. As the calendar flips by, it leaves a sense of anxiety that my 2020 cycling days are numbered. Those feelings of anxiety are a direct result of the sheer exuberance I have discovered as I join like-minded cycling enthusiasts in exploring the beauty that Ontario offers to those who care to explore. With Joyce and I doing our part to isolate during this pandemic, I have taken full advantage of expanding my health-conscious, masked, distanced social circle to include people that many of my older friends would raise an eyebrow or crinkle a forehead over. It has been refreshing to expand the circle to include many of whom I would never had the chance to know.

Some see the glass half consumed; I see half of a delicious treat left to enjoy ... it's all about attitude. 

As Mother Nature granted us a November reprieve from the normal gusty, bone-chilling gales we've become accustomed to, I have continued to venture out into the surrounding countryside on my trusty two-wheeled stallion, albeit donning the requisite multiple layers of my MAMIL attire. Much of that has been solo but I have encountered a number of like-minded stalwarts who have extended an invitation to accompany them as they do the same. 

There is some obvious crossover from my "old" circle to this "new" one as those that were the reason I even ventured into the world of cycling offer opportunities to meet others that fill their own circles. A while ago, my good friend Kevin Simms ... my guru of all things cycling ... said to me that I will know that I have embraced the #bikelife when I choose to drive to new locations to experience what those areas have to offer atop the saddle of my stallion. What was originally met with curious denial has become entrenched in my psyche. 

Another cycling enthusiast I have accepted into my circle during this transformation is Jay Rothenburg, a former Barrie North colleague and long-time avid biker. Recently, I joined a group of new-to-me friends of Jay's on a ride from Stayner to Meaford, taking advantage of the tremendous trail system in Clearview Township. We all drove out to Stayner to take advantage of the designated parking there for access to the Georgian Trail, geared up, clipped in and set out in the early hours of the morn on our odyssey. The composition of this new cadre included those from Barrie (Ruth and I), Springwater (Jay), Newmarket (JP), Aurora (Steve B) and Midhurst (Steve K). 

The great difference between solo training and social riding, besides the obvious opportunity for conversational interaction, is the willingness to take a small break spurred by a gorgeous vista or curious happenstance. On the journey to Meaford, we marvelled at the natural beauty of Georgian Bay, pulling out our Smartphones to capture the sights by mugging in a bicycle sort of way. Arriving at the harbour in Meaford beneath an incredible cloudless sky, we took a silent moment of reflection to commune with the "Great Outdoors" and recharge the "batteries" drained by the toils of this pandemic. A quick refuel at the Leaky Canoe ... highly recommended ... we completed the journey to the tune of 100 km round trip with the arrival back in Stayner. 

The level of enjoyment was so high on the Meaford trip, an encore was hatched to include the sights and sounds of Ontario's south-central Elora Gorge by using the Elora Cataract Trailway. Carpooling from the Barrie area, Jay + Ruth + I were joined by Hardy (see previous posts) and we pointed south and finally arrived at Alton, meeting Steve, JP and a new friend Barry (Toronto). We hit the trailhead at the infamous Forkes of the Credit Inn and were summarily impressed by the large variety of terrain we encountered, but topping the list ... much to the delight of this former fat guy ... was the slight detour to the Belwood Country Market at the insistence of JP who raved about the quality of the buttertarts they offer. My family has always harboured an affinity for Newmarket's Maid's Cottage so JP and I shared an animated discussion on each bakery's merits. I will admit that while Belwood's version did not unseat my personal #1, they will become a very close 2nd, forcing Creemore's Affairs Catering to the bronze medal spot. The lay-over for the trip was Elora's famous brewery where some of the local wares were tasted before reversing course for the trip back to Alton. In the end, a respectable 108 km was clocked. 

I feel like we cyclists are living on borrowed time now that the middle of November has arrived, so I am not at all optimistic about the 3rd odyssey of 2020, but it's been a pretty strange year, so there's always a little hope. Pretty soon, I'll have to decide how my compulsion for fitness-related activities will be satiated with a blanket of the fluff-stuff coating the countryside. Nordic Skiing? Perhaps. Snowshoeing? A big maybe. Yoga? A long shot but this year's been full of new experiences so why buck the trend?

Those that knew my former 280-320 lb self just experienced a little giggle as images of me doing Yoga popped into their head!

You're welcome for adding a little laughter to your life.

Post-birthday musings

Just how lucky can a feller get? 

As the day dawned on Tuesday November 3rd, I awoke early enough to witness the orangy-pink hues of a glorious sunrise peeking from behind the now barren Maples at the back of the yard, and it occurred to me that I was most certainly blessed to be in the position I find myself. My 57th birthday was my first as a retired old fart and the plan was to point the Tacoma northward to spend it with my beloved wife and her mother, who also celebrates each year on November 3rd. How's that for Kismit? Not enough? Her brother - Joyce's Uncle Dick - was also born on November 3rd. And a host of Facebook friends too! 

Now, I have to tell you, I'm not a huge birthday guy, and unless my own mother can correct me, I'm not sure I ever have been. Sure, I'd wager that things were pretty high strung in the Porter household when I was a wee lad, but I'm talking about the days that are still accessible in the dusty cobwebbed corners of my brain. Having said that, and absolutely no surprise to anyone who has known me for a while, I do really enjoy the traditional birthday treats. My personal ride on the the body shape rollercoaster is all the proof you need to confirm sweets as my Kryptonite.

This year, the love of my life set to work in the kitchen to create a unique celebration treat - FROM SCRATCH - called Monkey Bread, or at least the version we call Monkey Bread. To us, that means home made bread nuggets coated in cinnamon sugary goodness. When it's fresh out of the oven, with ooey gooey deliciousness tantalizing your entire olfactory system, and pulls apart leaving strings of yummy caramel strung from nugget to mound, it's food fit for the Gods. I am slightly embarrassed to admit that I consumed a significant portion of the creation myself. 

Hey, I have to fuel up the muscles with glycogen in preparation for another epic ride!

It would come as no surprise that the Monkey Bread was made from scratch if you were talking about our daughter Maddison, what with her near legendary status as baker par excellence. That is not to say that Joyce is not talented, because she most definitely is, but she doesn't embrace the FROM SCRATCH idea with regularity. With retirement's attempts to eat a more health conscious diet, we haven't had very many "cheat days" but a birthday cries out to be an exception. 

The drive to Haliburton was an uneventful one, arriving at the MIL's building PDQ. We had a lovely visit, I took charge of the Instapot pasta dish we had prepped for lunch, and the three of us enjoyed a wonderful meal capped off with Pearl's Angel Food Cake adorned with two blazing beacons of birthday joy. Between Pearl's 91 and my 57, the Fire Marshall would have taken exception if we attempted a true representation! The coup de grace to the day came with the emergence of one of the most incredible sunsets ever, as the sky was ablaze with fire-coloured hues of yellow+orange+pink, on the journey home.

Man, Life really is Good!

To the 250+ friends who took time out of their Covid-infused lives to jot me a short note of well wishes, I offer my most sincere and humblest thanks for brightening my day. Say what you will about the evils of Social Media, it can be used for greatness with it's convenience for sharing messages of congratulations and joy. I feel very blessed to have people who so willingly gift me a portion of their love. I'm still awash in the after-glow of those amazing feelings. Much love to all!

Changing roles feels somehow wrong?

Like so many of us during this pandemic, the wife and I have occupied our evenings with entertainment from Netflix, the latest of which is the series "The Crown", chronicling the life of Queen Elisabeth. The unenviable task of portraying the early years of such an iconic historical figure was first accepted by Claire Foy. I have to admit that I thought she was my favourite character in the first 2 seasons. Although I'm in no way, shape or form a "Royal" (monarchy supporter), I felt that Foy captured what I understood the Queen to be, right down to her Windsor accent.

Taking a break from the series, we happened on the 4th instalment of the "Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" series, and we decided to take a chance since we had watched .. and enjoyed ... the first 3 in the quadrilogy. Is that even a word? It took about 15 minutes of the opening action to come to the realization that Foy was the latest female in the lead of the heroine, Lizbeth Salander. It won't mean much to you if you haven't watched the two roles play out on the "big screen", but believe you me that the two characters couldn't be more diametrically opposed. While Foy's Queen Elisabeth was a very believable British aristocrat and all that you could expect as Queen, her Salander continued the dark and deeply troubled lesbian computer hacker who has more lives than a cat, as the saying goes. 

That brings me to the subject of this particular ditty ... the phenomenon of getting used to actresses/actors in significantly different roles, and more to the point, my acceptance of the stark contrast that arises. This is not a new occurrence, especially considering that being nearly 57 I have watched a ridiculous number of films and shows that have featured the re-casting of characters I came to identify with certain characteristics. Accepting that is a whole different matter. 

Being COMPLETELY unfair to Daniel Radcliffe ... Harry Potter ... I simply cannot accept him in any other role. I've tried to make it through a couple of his other pieces of work and have failed miserably. The cherubic, cunning, courageous hero that thrilled us through eight blockbuster films (plus I read all of the books with my kids as they grew up) became so synonymous with the Harry Potter character that I cannot believe his subsequent roles and came away with an empty feeling each time I tried. It was hard enough watching the adolescent Radcliffe physically mature over the 11 years that it took to make all 8 movies, losing his innocent boyish charm for the whiskered, deeply troubled young man who finally bested Voldemort in the epic culmination, but some of the other films were, IMHO, not very entertaining. Incredibly, Radcliffe has a lengthy bio (https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0705356/) that far exceeds the comparably short list of Potter movies. Good for him!

One of the other Netflix series we watched the entirety of was "Outlander", the story of a romance between a 20th century New England surgeon and a 17th century Highlander that spanned the ages due to some curiously odd time travel. In the series, Jamie Fraser's (Sam Heughan) chief nemesis is Jonathan Randall (Tobias Menzies), a British officer who is a sociopathic gay man with a hankering for rugged kilted Scots like Fraser. Imagine my horror, if you can, to find the middle aged Prince Phillip in the series "The Crown" being portrayed by Menzies, in all of his posh, polished accented glory. It's just not okay says my brain!

Now, using all of your imagination, try to understand the dichotomy that presented itself when we started the 3rd season of "The Crown" and were challenged with Helena Bonham-Carter's casting as Princess Margaret. Considering my introduction to Bohnam-Carter as the profoundly detestable Bellatrix Lestrange from the Potter series, I found the portrayal of the spoilt, party-hound, bratty Princess slightly more on point than others I have posed in this post. Still, it is hard to get my mind around.

I am not standing on my soap box, trumpeting type-casting as the way to do things. I am not insinuating that actresses/actors limit themselves to a particular type of role/character. I am simply saying that it becomes a lot for my aged, routined, regimented mind to deal with. 

And that's enough of that.

Think like a "HOG"!

The position of lineman in American Football is indeed one lacking the appropriate appreciation. As the graphic points out, there are many redeemable qualities that lineman exemplify which, if applied generously across society, could make the world a better place. One of my TRUE pet peeves with the state of civilization right now is the notion that everyone should strive to be the star, consequences be damned. IMHO, this has led to enormous negative impacts on the health of the planet as humans rape the natural world for the almighty dollar. I am not belittling anyone's work ethic or effort, and those that work the hardest should enjoy the fruits of their labour. If, however, that the hunt for the gain results in irreparable harm to the global ecology, wiping out immeasurable numbers of species and tipping the balance toward irreversible sweeping changes, then I see that as tragic. These changes are facts, not opinions. If you wish to give your conscience a jolt, watch David Attenborough's new documentary on Netflix.

I have played A LOT of football in my life! I started like most kids of my generation with the Junior team when I entered high school. I was a late maturer, but I was still of a decent enough stature that the coaches figured me to be a lineman. Of course, not being much different from others my age, I had delusions of grandeur, and I felt that I could have more of an impact role, lineman not being quite up to par in my mind. Being the most dangerous type of competitor ... one with illusions of grandeur ... I begrudgingly accepted the coach's decision and hoped my practice habits would show my true abilities and worth. My plight was exasperated when genetics kicked in and a 14 year old growth spurt made my physique resemble the stereotypical lineman, proving my Jr coaches to be clairvoyant. As the high school experience played out, I moved laterally along the line, and finished it as a Tight End, or quasi-lineman.

When I made the transition from High School to University, I had dreams of making the move to an impact role, but I was "pigeon holed" yet again, despite being a sapling in a forest of mighty oaks. Who was I to complain, though? I started every game as a freshman, enjoying considerable success, eventually losing in the conference finals. Imagine my delight ... cue the sarcasm ... when I was rewarded for my hard work in the weight room, moving from Tight End to Guard for my sophomore year. Thankfully, maturity had struck my brain like it had my body, and I willingly adopted my new role. Yet again, the coaches proved to be fortune tellers as we made it all the way to the Vanier Cup game, the CIS version of the Super Bowl. Returning for my Junior year, I was surprised to see a change in offensive philosophy toward a "PRO" style scheme and was asked to go move laterally along the line again to almost the same. The new position was coined Wingback but, truth be told, I was still a lineman, both in body and soul, having embraced my value to the overall system. 

Where does this all lead, you might be pondering?

My life in the trench warfare of football has taught me some valuable life lessons:

1. I don't need to be exalted, put on a pedestal, or shine in the spot light. The pride I feel for performing my task with military precision, clearing a path for the TEAM to succeed creates a warming glow in my soul. Do the drone bees who devote their whole lives to caring for the queen, constructing and protecting the nest, foraging for food, and tending the larvae begrudge their role? Like millions of examples in the natural world, life is about team work, with one role being no more important than the next.
2. Regardless of the role, embracing the excellence that is required to complete the action at 100% effectiveness should be the aim. Having said that, it is incumbent on the more "visible" members to acknowledge the contributions of all members as valid and necessary for the team's success, and the rewards earned should be shared appropriately. Again, look to the natural world for countless examples of symbiotic relationships and colonies.
3. We are a species that is populated by piano builders, piano players and piano movers. The concerts of life will not happen unless all involved work harmoniously to achieve the end goal and create extraordinary music. If giving out medals for tree climbing, the fish will never best the squirrel, nor should it be expected to since its skill set is a polar opposite. Embrace your strengths and talents while acknowledging your weaknesses and you'll be content with your station in life.
4. Avoid a sense of entitlement. My father was a Queen's Hall of Famer. Being completely honest, the athletic gifts he bestowed upon my chromosomes put me on par with him. I could have chosen to react negatively to being viewed as a lineman, but I instead chose to embrace it, and in the process, made some of my dearest friendships toiling in the trenches at Queen's ... I'm talking about you Sam Ashton, Mike Schad, Steve Hudson, John Larsen, Frank Kakouris, Mark Oakley, Tom Stefopoulos, Chris Stefopoulos, Vince Panetta, Tony McDowell, Charlie Galunic. We are the masters of our destiny, not some otherworldly power, so get busy controlling what you can control and accepting what you cannot. It all boils down to your attitude! Former Notre Dame Football coach Lou Holtz says, "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it."

For what it's worth, those are my thoughts and opinions. 

Use them how you see fit.